Tuesday, January 20 2009
Of Wine and Werewolves
Nice doggie!
Man, it's like news stories are designed to scare me--me, personally. According to the Daily Mail if you've got the right sort of liver, and enjoy a bit too much wine, it can turn you into a werewolf.
All Eddie wanted for his sixth birthday was some Burma-Shave and a Supercuts® franchise
Well, not exactly. According to Dr. Ken Walker, a combination of excess sunshine, defective liver enzymes and too much wine consumption lead to a case of porphyria cutanea tarda. Dr. Walker relates that in addition to blistering, fragile skin
Some types of porphyria, including mine, have one other weird, inexplicable symptom. You get extra hair growing on your face. Between my lower eyelids and my normal beardline, I was having to shave for the first time ever.
Not just downy 'bum-fluff' either, but fully- developed dark bristles.
Unfortunately, porphyria doesn't give you extra hair where you really want it as a middleaged man and my temples stayed as bald as ever.
I had turned into a strange-coloured man with weird facial hair who had to avoid the sun. No wonder porphyria is often thought to be the medical condition behind such myths as werewolves and vampires.
Well. If there was ever a reason to watch how much you were consuming, this would be it. I'm in the midst of my yearly (and usually short-lived) virtuous living spree of whole and organic foods, no alcohol, plenty of fresh air and exercise and early to bed, and I have to admit, I'm utterly miserable. Still, it beats the chance of porphyria.
I am not a wookie!
And at least I don't have to shave my eyelids.
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