Doing What He Does Best

It'd leave a sour taste in anyone's mouth

It's no secret that I'm not BFF with Robert Parker. He is, after all, pretty much the most pernicious influence on the world of wine today, dumbing down good wine, pumping up bad wine, and generally distorting consumer perceptions about what wine is and should be--all to his personal profit.

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Blame It On Randall

On the outside looking in?

I have curious, if somewhat tenuous connection to Randall Grahm (above), proprietor of Bonny Doon Vineyards and all-around wildly inventive marketer and polymathic winester. Bonny Doon used to sponsor a writing contest, 'A Gutwrenching Parody of Staggering Silliness'. On a whim I entered one year and to my surprise I took 5th place (of ten) in the Laureate's category for my silly little parody of Gravity's Rainbow (link: it's about halfway down the page).

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Happy Parilia!

I can't believe you forgot the marshmallows! What will we eat with the lark's tongues?

Regular readers of this blog (why does that phrase always make me think of bran cereal and prunes?) will note that I like a bit of comparative culture. Last April I made note of Grounation Day, the Rastafari commemoration the visit of Ethiopian Emperor Haile Selassie to Jamaica in 1966. This year I got interested in the Roman festival of Parilia.

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Training the Trainer

Will there be a test on Monday?

I had an interesting experience last week. I had to take a training course on a field outside my normal one (specialising in explaining consumer-produced wine can only be considered 'normal' only for a given value of normal, one supposes) and for once, instead of being the guy with the books, lectures and tests I was the guy with the pencil, paper, and question.

It was a firearms training course, so while I have past experience with the subject, I'm no expert, and had to rely on my instructor for almost all of the correct technical information regarding the technology and construction of firearms, the correct and safe use of them, and the way they must be used under law.

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Off to the Centre of Canada!

Amish limousine, seen in Niagara On the Lake

It's a busy old week lined up for Winexpert. Many of the management and executive team are gathering in Ontario for Fiscal 2010 planning meetings. It takes a lot of time to coordinate the activities of our various divisions, given the complexity of the business, so we like to get started early.

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Doing What Works

Red wine does not go with gasoline

Interesting news from Decanter: Allegrini winery gives away wine to designated drivers. It works like this: in restaurants the designated driver who does not imbibe gets a bottle of Allegrini's Palazzo del Torre wine to take home and enjoy at another time.

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Valuing Your Customers

Startlingly accurate cartoon by Dave Walker

Customer service occupies a lot of my attention. I'm responsible for the answers we give to, and the solutions we provide for people who have concerns with our products. You know the saying, 'The Buck Stops Here'? Well, it usually stops antlers-first, and 'here' is my desk.

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Can You Hear That Thunder?

Boing! Boing! Boing!

I love reading the British newspaper Financial Times for a variety of reasons. First, it's got good journalism and a soothingly neutral and cool quality to its prose. Second, I don't understand high finance at all, but sometimes they come through with an article simple enough for even me.

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Qui Cantos Ipsos Cantori?

The Bluebird of Chattiness?

It's official: I am apparently a band-wagoneer, now having signed up for a Twitter account, @WinexpertTim.

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Happy Birthday, Chuck and Jack

Europe's greatest ruler and its greatest lover, born this day.

April 2nd marks the birthday of both Karolus Magnus, rex Francorum, rex Langobardorum and imperator Romanorum and Giacomo Girolamo Casanova de Seingalt, a librarian with an interesting hobby. Modern folk will most likely recognise them by the handles Charlemagne and Casanova.

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New Products from Winexpert!

Dateline: April 1st, Winexpert International Product Science Headquarters


Winexpert is proud to announce an entirely new line of consumer winemaking products to our kit line! We're blending the best of new technology, desirable wine styles and a fun, 'hip' drinking experience for our loyal customers in the tradition of innovation that has seen the introduction of the World's First Carbon Neutral Wine Kit and many others!

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